Patrick vs Golden Gopher - FFL
Week 5 of 195 people have taken Patrick on
- If Patrick loses
- $350
- Next year's draft fund as you see fit.
- If Patrick wins
- You wear a T-shirt of my choosing to next year's draft.
- Handicap
- Best 55% of the field counts
The Fantasy Dad Bod Challenge
Take on your friends.
Everyone wins when everyone loses.
Why this exists
I wanted to challenge my fantasy football league to lose weight.
I really want to lose weight. I also want them to — we've played together for twenty-five years and I'd like twenty-five more. So I did the only thing that has ever worked on me: I made quitting expensive, in front of the people whose opinion I actually care about.
Me against all of them. If I lose, I pay. If I win, they owe me something they'll hate a little.
— Patrick
How it works
01
You call them out
You against the rest of the group. It doesn't have to be a fantasy league, but the tighter the group, the harder it bites.
02
You put up more than they do
A real penalty on you — money you'd hate to hand over. A small, embarrassing one on them. You started it, so you carry the heavier end.
03
Win the most weeks
Every week is a matchup, like fantasy football: your percent lost against the group's average, scored on each person's own starting weight so it's fair whatever anyone weighs today. By default their worst performer that week doesn't count, so you're beating the ones who are trying. Most weeks won takes the bet. Weigh in once a week or every day — a photo of the scale keeps it honest, and nobody else ever sees it.
A sample wagerMine, this season
If I lose
$350
Into next year's draft fund. Theirs to spend, in front of me.
If I win
I pick the shirt they wear at the draft
Small, non-cash, and impossible to buy your way out of.
Yours can be anything you'll actually honour. The only rule that matters: the penalty on you has to outweigh the temptation to quit.
Five weeks in
What a challenge looks like on your phone once the season is going. This one is a sample: the names and numbers are made up, the screens are the real app.
The scoreboard
Your stake, your record, and whether you're ahead on the season. Weekly wins are straight up.
Every week, settled
The best 75% of the field counts. Whoever had a rough week is benched for that week only.
The whole season
Who took each week, and what's still to play. Byes are marked from day one.
Your numbers, for you
Your pounds and daily chart. Only you see this page; everyone else sees percentages.
Two ideas doing the work
The commitment contract
Make missing the goal hurt more than hitting it.
Willpower loses to a bowl of ice cream at 10pm. A stake does not. Put something real on the line and future-you stops getting a vote.
Prosocial motivation
You'll do more for them than you'll do for yourself.
People work harder and stick at it longer when somebody else benefits. Challenging your friends to get healthier is the excuse you needed to do it yourself.
Live right now
People who put something on the line. Shown with their permission — headcounts and terms only, never anybody's numbers.
Name your stake.
Free. No money moves through this site — the bet is between you and your people. We just keep score, and make sure nobody rewrites history in January.
Questions you're going to get asked
+ − Who sees my photos?
You. That's the whole list. An AI reads the number off the scale — not the person who started the challenge, not your opponents, nobody. Photos are deleted 30 days after the season settles.
+ − Does everyone see what I weigh?
Never. Everyone sees percentages, not pounds. Your actual weight is between you and your scale.
+ − Isn't this rigged for the big guys?
The opposite of rigged — everything is percent of your own starting weight. Ten pounds off a 200-lb frame beats ten pounds off a 300-lb frame.
+ − Why does the challenger have a handicap?
Because he picked the fight. The field is scored on its best 75%, so the challenger has to beat the ones who are actually trying — and can't win because somebody had a rough week. Whoever has the worst week is benched for that week only, and is back in contention the next one.
+ − What stops someone from just not weighing in?
A missed week scores zero and it's visible. Three in a row and you're inactive — you haven't beaten anyone, you've just stopped. Two bye weeks per person, declared in advance, cover the wedding and the work trip.
+ − Can women join?
Absolutely. The name is a joke about who's usually in these leagues, not a rule about who can play. Scoring is percent of your own starting weight, so a 140-lb woman and a 290-lb man compete on exactly even terms — that's the whole design.
+ − Can I use a GLP-1 — Ozempic, Wegovy, Zepbound?
Yes. Anything your doctor prescribed is allowed, full stop. This is about getting healthier; the bet is a bonus. Nobody is drug-testing a side bet, and a guy whose doctor put him on a GLP-1 is doing exactly what he should be doing.
+ − So there's no rule about how I lose it?
One: don't do anything stupid to win a side bet. A single week's credit is capped at 2% of your starting weight, so dehydrating yourself the night before weigh-in earns you nothing but a bad morning. Talk to your doctor before you change anything real — and remember the guy who loses 30 lb and puts it back on in February beat nobody.
+ − What does it cost to use?
Nothing. The only money that moves is the stake you set, and it moves between you and your people — never through this site. There's no entry fee and no payment processing here at all.